Politicians and celebrities babbled, contradicted themselves
צילום: סידי בנק
Did they really say that?
Politicians and celebrities babbled, contradicted themselves, overdid it and ended up looking daft this year. Ynet has collected some of the best, most outrageous expressions of the year. 2005 in review
"You don't leave your home"
Defense Minister Shaul Mofaz tried to show uncompromising leadership during a campaign visit to Hatikva Market in Tel Aviv while running for the chairmanship of the Likud. "Sharon offered me the position of Vice Premier and Defense Minister, (but) I withstood this most difficult test." Just two days later, Mofaz was gone, calling the Likud an "extreme right" party and guns blazing at his new home in Kadima. "The Likud has distanced itself from me," he said. Who abandoned who?
"Once, I left a political party together with Ben-Gurion. That's the last time!"
Another political summersault, this time by Shimon Peres, following rumors that he intends to defect to Kadima. But presto! - two weeks later, there was Peres alongside Sharon, saying: "in the current political construct it is impossible to advance the peace process, except through a coalition for peace and development. I believe the right person to head such as a coalition is Arik Sharon." Not to be accused of being inconsistent, Peres again quoted Ben-Gurion: "I learned from my teacher, David Ben-Gurion, to put the country ahead of the party." Can anyone hear violent turning sounds from a grave in Sde-Boker?
"If Shimon Peres ran against himself to head the maintenance committee in his apartment building, he’d come in second"
As a candidate for the Labor Party chairmanship Ehud Barak left little doubt about his feelings for his main rival. But two months is along time in Israeli politics, and eventually Barak dropped out of the race and called on the other candidates to unite behind Peres. By the way, Barak was also the one who said – "the hat burns on the loser’s head."
"State of Israel will file no indictments to please this or that sector"
That’s what the Attorney General Menachem Mazuz declared with determination following public criticism regarding the decision try any police officers involved in the October 2000 riots in which 13 Israeli Arabs were killed. Israel’s Arab community threatened to take strong protest measures unless the decision was reversed, but Mazuz gave full backing to the Ministry of Justice’s Police Investigation Unit and claimed the decision was final.
A week later the director of the unit, Herzl Shviro, announced the conclusions would be reexamined. "We have decided to verify our conclusions as if an appeal was filed," said Shviro, but reiterated that the investigation brief would not be reopened.
Me and my big mouth
"Let them burn! Shit on them!"
With sensitivity and determination, Negev region police commander Niso Shaham exposed the modus operandi that should be taken against right-wing protestors gathered in Kfar Maimon to oppose the disengagement plan. "I know these orthodox people... I want arrests, arrests is what will break them… if necessary, beat them with truncheons, low… I don’t remember any whore that willingly opens her legs… let them pay up." Shaham was tried and reprimanded following the incident.
"He’ll get one blow to the nose and won’t get up"
Rabbi Ovadia Yosef, the Shas Party’s spiritual leader, expressed his personal opposition to the disengagement plan and publicly wished for Prime Minister Sharon to be punished by God for the Gaza pullout. "How cruel is the evil man for uttering such things," he said in his weekly sermon. But much like Mazuz, Yosef was careful not to tie his remarks to possible incitement, and quickly explained he did not wish for Sharon’s death, but only to block disengagement. Ahh... now we get it.
"Peretz's North African militias infiltrated the party and took over"
After Amir Peretz was elected to head the Labor party, Gigi Peres, brother of the deposed chairman, attacked both Peretz and "fascist" former Prime Minister Ehud Barak, saying, "It’s like crabs at sea that go into shells – you don’t know if it’s a snail or a crab.” The next day, following harsh criticism, he repented – "I am truly sorry that it sounded like racism. I cannot be a racist; all my grandchildren are North Africans. I am quite shocked by my own remarks." Even Golda would have been s-h-o-c-k-e-d.
"They are like leaches, I am so sick of them"
Following Michael Jackson's much-publicized trial and subsequent departure for Bahrain, it seemed the world would get some peace and quiet from the former king of pop. But this remark proved he just cannot stay away from the limelight, and that he just doesn’t like Jews. After he realized that his former advisor filed a USD 64 million lawsuit against him, Jackson decided to leave him a voicemail message – "I am so sick of them… they make so much money, they made me broke.. It’s a plot. The Jews are doing this intentionally." This message was eventually heard around the world. Jackson did not bother to reply to the criticisms and accusations of anti-Semitism. His advisors were satisfied with a laconic response that the conversation was recorded illegally, and without Jackson’s consent. Adolf, right behind ya…
Corruption? What, me?
"90 percent of Israel plagiarizes academic papers"
Shas MK Yair Peretz made it to the headlines in not-so-flattering circumstances, after being accused of submitted an academic paper he copied from a Bar-Ilan University student, without her knowledge. Unfortunately for him, Peretz forgot to change the author’s voice from first-person feminine to masculine. In court, Peretz tried to reduce the gravity of the offense, claiming – "everybody’s doing it." That makes it right, yeah?
"I took the panels, but not the ‘brain’"
From one brilliant mind to another – Knesset Member Yehiel Hazan never thought things would turn out like this. What started as a suspicious entry to the Knesset store room resulted in a criminal investigation over an alleged attempt to interfere with a double-vote affair. Hazan denied ever visiting the store room was caught by security cameras leaving the room with a bag. Later he broke down and admitted taking panels from the old voting apparatus. "It is nothing but a ‘storm in a teacup’, there was a misunderstanding – they thought I took the ‘brain’ ". Who needs political satire?
God and I
"God told me: George, go on and fight the terrorists in Afghanistan and Iraq"
President Bush was furious over the leak and strongly denied ever making those remarks, but that’s what Palestinian minister Nabil Shaath said Bush told him. Shaath said that in a conversation with the American president, Bush revealed the real reason he led Americans into war in Iraq and Afghanistan: "God told me: George, go on and put an end to tyranny in Iraq, and so I did. And now, once again, I feel the words of God come to me: go on and get the Palestinians their own country, give the Israelis their security and bring peace to the Middle East. And in God’s name that’s what I’ll do."
Got it? Got it…
"Sharon should be protected like an Etrog"
Journalist Amnon Abramovich has been one of Ariel Sharon's harshest critics for years, but he never hid his support for the disengagement plan, saying the media should grant Sharon a honeymoon period to allow to him implement the plan. But, should there be any doubt, Abramovich said, "I am willing to move in his direction until the end of September 2005, after that we’ll reconsider." So what about 2006, Amnon, like a Lulav ?
