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'Couldn't stop thinking about her last boyfriend'
Amir is an eligible bachelor, the kind that looks for a Cinderella. It doesn't take much for him to label a girl 'not right'
Kortezz Uraban
"Enough, man, I can't take it anymore, just can't. From one date to another, one girl to the next, it is getting worse," says Amir, shaking his head in despair.
I know this intro. It means: "I need to have a heart-to-heart and I didn't know how to start so please ask me something before I lose it."
Amir is a good friend and an eligible bachelor in the local dating scene. He has a bright future ahead of him and a bunch of short-term relationships in his resume. He is one of those people who look for "The One" and thus is not very forgiving when it comes to overlooking the other party's mistakes or shortcomings.
Usually, he gives girls one chance, a mistake on the girl's part will cause him to label her as "wrong" and quickly move to the next one.
As a friend I have the right to let him have it when I feel he crossed the line. He is allowed to reciprocate. Yet my duty – first and foremost – is to listen. So, I took a deep breath, put on my empathetic face and said: "talk to me."
And he did talk: "It's not that she's crazy or weird. She's cute, charming and intelligent and really fun to be with. But I knew it was too good to be true."
He paused, cynically smiling, looking at me with that gaze that means "here it comes…" and continued: "On the third date, in a coffee shop on the beach, we started talking about crazy things we did. We played this sort of game where you tell two things about yourself, one true and the other false and the other one must guess which is which. It's a funny way to talk about he skeletons in my closet and get to know her's and hope for the best.
"Her's were:
A. I participated in an orgy
B. I had an Arab boyfriend
"Do you get it? Know what? I was willing to be open-minded as long the answer was A. Yet fate had other plans. "You dated an Arab?" I asked. "yes," she replied nonchalantly, "it was a while back, a real nice guy I met in college. We were together for a month. Not a big deal."
"That instant the smile was wiped off my face. From a cute, interesting girl she turned into a mega freak with a big neon sign – dated an Arab – blinking over her head".
"He there," I jumped in, "don't you think you got carried away? Com on, Amir, think logically. All she did was date a guy. Try to overcome your prejudice. Check out the fact: she didn't date an alien, just a person. Come on, really".
"Did you hear what I said," Amir yelled? "She dated an Arab".
"So? Didn't you say she is a great girl?"
"But that proves she has no common sense what so ever. She should have known no one will take her seriously anymore. She should have known such a relationship would never last", Amir said.
"But why?" I asked. "What would you say if some European would dump a girl because she used to date a Jewish guy? I have a feeling the word 'anti-Semite' would be mentioned a couple of times".
Amir exhibited some resistance but in the end decided to give it another chance. Three days later we met again.
"It's over, man," he whispered. "I couldn't get her Arab boyfriend out of my mind. I started thinking about my mother crying at our wedding and not tears of joy. I freaked out so I told her what I was feeling. She was insulted and kicked me out for good".
I didn't know what to tell him. Truth is I didn't want to say anything. He probably doesn't deserve someone like her. Someone who dates a person for who they are inside, no labels, no prejudice. Someone who is not ashamed to stand up for her beliefs.
We were quiet.
Amir looked at me in anticipation. "What's up? Cat got your tongue?"
"Well, I do have one question, man," I replied, "What's her number?"
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