Question:
Who is supposed to pay for the groom’s wedding ring? I was told that, in addition to the ring which he purchases for the bride, the groom also pays for his own ring. Is this true? -- Shelli, Hadera
Answer:
Jewish law maintains that a purely oral agreement is not binding. In order for a marriage ceremony to come into effect, a physical act must be involved. Therefore, the groom gives an object (ie, the ring) to the bride.
The object in question must belong to the groom, and therefore, the groom must purchase the wedding ring with his own money.
In many circles today, the ring serves another function as well. Wedding rings are considered to be status symbols; the ring indicates that the wearer is married.
Nevertheless, we must not confuse the two issues.
The wedding ring which the groom gives to the bride is mandatory. However, a wedding ring as a status symbol is dependent on social custom.
During the “chupah” (marriage ceremony), the bride is not required to give a ring to the groom. In fact, many halachic arbiters frown on such a practice, because it detracts from the obligatory ring given by the groom to the bride. Thus, at Tzohar weddings, the bride does not give a ring to the groom during the actual ceremony.
In conclusion, if the groom chooses to wear a ring as a status symbol after the ceremony, he is permitted to purchase it for himself. But he is required to pay – out of his own money - for the ring which he presents to the bride.
Congratulations!
(Rabbi Yaron Ben David)
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