and treat everyone as an individual and treat each circumstance individually instead of trying to create grand rules for everyone? bad decision making thats what this is make whatever decision is right for you whatever rules or other mumbo jumbo you come up with is not going to make the decision for you

If you approach life, and its sacred relationships, as an animal or mind game, you will never know the profound gift of self-sacrificing love. Another consequence: a shallow, hedonist lifeview will doom Israel. This author seriously needs to grow up.

He is just as much the whore/slut for following through with it. After all it takes 2 to tango.

Regarding your sentence: "Every young woman has encountered this age-old problem: How many dates should you wait before sleeping with the guy?" How wrong you are. There are many young women who have never asked themselves this "age-old" question, because they don't sleep with the guy till they marry him. Get a life and learn about the wide world out there beyond your bed.

Maybe for druids, philistines, amalakites, pagans, but should not be so for Jews. We must have a more meaningful question than this. How about Rachel and Rebecca for role models? Anyway, you go ahead and live your self-obsessed 0.3-children-per-woman life, and we will rule the future.

Wow...these people you describe who have sex with so many people....how many STDs do they have?

that's what many men want. It's not a matter of dominance, we are quite tired of femminist who see it all as a struggle, quite like marxists apllied the conflict of classes theory to everything - the only difference is that marxism died and this femminist appoach is still alive. As for the typical anachronic approach that if he has sex at the first date he is a macho while she is a whore, it's stupid and full of hypocrysy, but the solution for women is not being as easy as many men are. You'd better make him wait a few days, it's not a matter of being easy, just of being worth making some effort

If you just want sex, then fine, go ahead. But if you want more, relationship/marraige, of course he's going to kick you out if you give it up so quickly. That's because it (and by extension you) don't mean much.

What a bullshit, yes sex, no sex on the first date....there are no rules, people should do what they feel good with and accept the consequenses....and if you have sex on your first date and he doesn't want to see you anymore because of that, you are better of, what a hypocrits are these guys...men end women are equal....wake up we live in the 21st century...btw i had sex on my first date and we are happily married with a beautiful babygirl...

After my last experiencies, i discovered that it is better to do what make u happy and thats it. If u want to make it last night and feel quite next day if he doesnt call u, do it and enjoy. One month ago i just met a nice guy but i didnt want to go to bed with him because i wanted something more serious.....he discovered my intention, it is so obvious...if there is chemistry that night. Why not. He dissapeared....so, enjoy, do what u want and dont follow those rules

The women here complaining about not getting that second phone call are only fooling themselves. Whether you want to believe it or not, men and women ARE different. They may want to have sex with you -- but once you put out, what's left, what's to look forward to, where's the mystery? Sure he show's you attention and is aggressive to get you -to get sexual satisfaction. But he doesn't want you - after. like the writer said," once he came bla bla bla" Obviously he doesn't want a sperm receptacle for a girl friend. All he has to do is the math ... she had one date with me and hopped in the sack -- how many BEFORE ME? Men want someone respectable with morals. They don't want some chick that hops in the sack on the first date. He gets that if he wants it -- and he may hit you twice but not for a relationship -- he's not taking you home to meet his mom.. Maybe she had a real "hot date" last night! For heavens sake women, wake up and put your legs together! Don't you see what you're doing to yourselves?

Very often, by the time the guy has decided he wants it on the first date, he may have already made up his mind that is all he wants - that he may always only see the woman as useful to him in that way. Like so many other things in life, here is one more d_'ed-if-you-do-or-don't scenario that is totally dependent on serendipity for success.

Much of our troubles is coming from people who cannot control their desires and they want the freedom just to do anything...! This is the point which Islamic mentality and the west will never settle.....

Sleeping around is banned in all the major religions, not just Islam. You will find plenty of people in the West and in Israel who agree with you on this issue. On the other hand, the west values free choice and individuality. Therefore, this specific behavior is tolerated, no matter if it is good or bad. Everyone is responsible for their own actions.

Tha is, I was born in 47 and came of age in the 60's. What a BIG mistake it was - all that sexual freedom!! All it did was give the guys a good time without having to think about a commitment. It resulted in a lot of sexually transmitted diseases. The sexual act is too special to be approached like any other 'fun' activity, like going to the movies or playing cards. It touches the core of ourselves and, thus, should not be done lightly - not even on the THIRD date. Ideally, the couple should wait until marriage; but if they can't there at least should be a committed relationship.

If you want anything more than a one night stand don't do it. Respect yourself. Make yourself an investment and make him invest. Don't be a tease, don't play games - you have to invest in him too - but make sure you are able to value yourself, and he values you, after you do finally decide to do the deed. The only way to do that is to build a valuable relationship in all other respects before allowing him to assault the citadel. He will treat you with as much respect as you have for yourself. Indeed, if you plan on marrying, make him wait. If he loves YOU he'll respect you more for it.

Einav says she used to believe that if having sex with a man on the first date caused him to not want her, he must be stuck in the Stone Age. I agree. Most men are--maybe in other ways most women are, too, I don't know. Most men are stuck in the Stone Age, and they have a long way to go.