Jewish Scene
Rabbi Lior: Youth violent because of moms' careers
Kobi Nahshoni
Published: 27.05.10, 09:37
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42 Talkbacks for this article
1. Fine Rabbi - get your students out of class and into jobs
Eric ,   Tel Aviv & New York   (05.27.10)
If this is the case then get the students out of Talmid class and into paying jobs so they can support their wives and children. As you created the problem, you are mistakenly citing, then you can fix it too.
2. Rabbi Lior
Anon ,   israel   (05.27.10)
The Youth violence is not to be blamed on working moms, how do you explain the increased violence of Haredi youth? Face it Israel is a violent country, where kids are exposed to it every day, in the News Papers they read about riots in Jerusalem,TV News again violence,and the stress of living in a country where terrorism and war could breakout any time. Most moms work here not because they have the choice, but because the jobs that their husbands have do not pay enough to live on!
3. Letter to Rabbi Lior
Barbara ,   Haifa Israel   (05.27.10)
I had worked throughout my childrens' growing up period, and neither of them became violent.. They are good upstanding citizens of the community. One has three kids of her own and a career, another working and is happy. No, violence stems from (1) not spending enough quality time with your kids, (2) the friends that your kids have around him - in other words, outside influence.
SINGER ,   singapore   (05.27.10)
5. Embarrassed to think that Rabbi's I have supported
Michelle ,   Israel   (05.27.10)
are spouting absolute rubbish. The violence being seen in all communities in Israel have absolutely nothing to do with women who chose to work. It saddens me to think that Rabbi Lior and Levanon, would disrespect the achievements and accomplishments women have made in this society. shame on both of them
6. King Solomon said a child left to himself brings the mother
Rivkah   (05.27.10)
to shame.
7. As if lack of sufficient money doesn't cause violence....
Global Citizen ,   Israel & USA   (05.27.10)
8. Shameful comments
Yakov ,   Tel Aviv   (05.27.10)
How sorry and sad that this kind of thinking exists. Worse yet, would be if a single Mother believed such rubbish. This "man" clearly has a deep seated hatred for woman, and can exist only when relegating woman to subservience. All one needs to do is look at other countries where woman work, and note how no statistical trend exists tying Mothers employment, to child delinquency. Indeed, in the USA and the UK, it appears to be due to the Fathers lack of investment in the family. The missing Dad phenomenon. These comments are disrespectful to woman. But worse, they teach men to be disrespectful of women. Maybe he is to blame for violence? Part of the beauty of Judaism is the reverence paid to woman and Motherhood. This man is not a good Jew! His Mother should spank him, and hard.
9. To Rabbi Lior
Arielush ,   Ramat Ha Golan   (05.27.10)
According to the rabbi, women are only good for breeding, child rearing and housekeeping. If that is the case why bother teaching us how to read or letting us go outside. Keep us tethered to the nursery and kitchen like a faithful cow.
10. #8: Yakov: YOU R Shameful
Israeli 2   (05.27.10)
#6 knows of what she speaks of. The wisdom of King Shlomo!! YEAH!
11. Young men are violent and whose fault is it? Women's!
Lisa   (05.27.10)
Another case of men blaming women for their own problems. Just like the way men have a tendency to be sexually predatory - so make the women wear a tent (it's their fault after all).
12. a child is not "left to himself" when the mother works...
eporue ,   europe   (05.27.10)
13. We could blame the state
Leah ,   Israel   (05.27.10)
Yes I do agree it would be good for mothers who would be happy to stay home with their families to do so, but what would actually cause more violence is lack of money and the stress that goes with that. Perhaps the state should pay mothers who want to stay home this will reduce the social welfare bill as there would be less cases of child neglect and even abuse by child carers. Children do need their mums and families need to support their children financially too!
14. The next Rabbi to make a fool of himself is Rabbi Lior
Talula ,   Israel   (05.27.10)
Step right up and receive your award! Honestly, why do they keep coming out with this crap? Is it to annoy us? Is it to get attention? Maybe Giveret Lior never gave her son enough attention when he was a child. On a personal note - I raised three of the most AMAZING children on the planet and I went to work. My children did not miss out on anything – they were hugged and kissed and read to and taught how to be decent caring human beings. It's NOT whether the mother is around, it's the qualities, values, love and caring that's instilled into children when she is around that matters. Most violent children have been raised in a violent home with violent parents - they don't know anything else, they think it’s normal. What about parents who are out of work? They are home with their kids, and still a majority of those children take to the streets and commit violent crimes. Why is he making these sweeping statements? Is he going to support those families when the mother gives up work? Or should they just give up work because he says so and sign on for welfare? !
15. 12 TRUE - #6&10 apparently claiming that fathers are useless
5th generation ,   Israel   (05.27.10)
16. #14-Perfect!
Yakov ,   Tel Aviv   (05.27.10)
A Mothers love. It has nothing to do with working or not, it is what is in your heart and who you are. What fortunate children you have. Your poignant comments speak the truth.
17. women's work
j ,   t   (05.27.10)
Women should also be supported to work. If the woman is working , men should take more responsibilities at home. Then no one can be blamed . Children will be helped when they see how parents struggle to bring them up.
18. What about Haredi and Settler youth violence??
Reb L. Yell ,   Carmiel, Israel   (05.27.10)
19. Sounds worse than it is.
Eliyahu Konn ,   Yrushalayim   (05.27.10)
Sure this is an attempt to capitalize on the former article about the "halachic" ruling for women not to run for a political office. I wonder though, how many of the talkbackers sing Eishet Chayil at the Shabbat table. Maybe the Rav's also had more explanation than the articles revealed. Sound bites are a hell of a way to sell a website. Were there any talkbacker's that offered a better reason for the violence?
20. 12&15: When my mother went to work and to college after
Rivkah   (05.27.10)
the youngest was in first grade, the family happiness dissipated and was gone. She was too tired to be patient with her children and became a screamer. She was not home when the children needed her and neither was the father since the oldest was 15 and expected to carry the load of the mother which she could not do. A child who is left with someone other than the mother or a near relative like a grandmother is subjected to catastrophic emotional distress when a caregiver changes employment after the child bonds to the person whether at a daycare center at at the home. That makes it difficult for the child to bond as a teenager or adult and criminality is often the outcome. A child left to himself who brings the mother to shame does not mean the mother is nowhere in his/her life. It means the mother is not taking the responsibility for the child as the Lord expects, but dumping the children on others who don't care about the child's emotional health and well being as much as a good mother should. My mother going to work was the worst thing that happened to the family. She became self-centered and tyrannical and destroyed her children's self esteem because she was not patient or kind to them because adding to the 24/7 job of being a mother with a school and/or work schedule was not possible without damaging the children by her hatred of them for being a burden. Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a stalled ox and hatred therewith, King Solomon said. I would have preferred a mother with little to the screaming hyena who brought home a paycheck and lorded it over even her husband.
21. Talula , 14
Charles ,   Petach Tikva   (05.27.10)
The men have to study at the yeshiva , the women may not work . So who will feed them ? .......You of course !
22. 21 Charles: In Germany and some other European countries,
Rivkah   (05.28.10)
people pay a one per cent tax to support religious leaders/pastors/priests/etc. The many decades of study at yeshivas should be paid for with an income since that brings a blessing on the nation if those people walk in God's ways as a protection for those who don't. Sodom was not destroyed until the one righteous man Lot was out of the city. It is worthwhile to support people who devote their lives to the study of the Torah and Tanach because they protect the nation as Lot protected Sodom. If you drive those people into the world so that they become like the people of Sodom instead of like Lot and Abraham, then you bring destruction on the nation.
23. 15 5th Gen: Fathers are not useless but in many occupations
Rivkah   (05.28.10)
they are not around much. As a US Army Lieutenant Colonel, my father was gone for a year or more at a time, seeing my mother on R&R in Hawaii or when the family could join him in a far away land like Germany or Japan for a tour of duty when housing became available which took a year or so of his being alone there first. When he had assignments like at NorthEastern University ROTC, he left the trailer we lived in in Massachusetts before we got up for school to catch a train to Boston and then came home late in the evening. He was gone all summer on maneuvers in Georgia. He was not useless, but he could not be at a job that was that demanding and be with his family when they came home from school, too. Many jobs for men are like that. Nurses work 8 hours unless the replacement does not come in and then it is 16 hours for a shift which often happens. Pharmacists work evenings and weekends, so they are not home with the children as much as they would like to be. Truck drivers are gone for days or weeks at a time to provide for their families. That is not being useless.
24. The reason for violence is
Israeli   (05.28.10)
our judiaciary system which rewards rapers and any violent individual without proper jail time PERIOD
25. Eishes Hail
19 Eluyahu   (05.28.10)
"Mimehak tavi lachma" from AFAR she brings her bread
26. Proverbs 31 women...
Ynet reader ,   Niles, IL, USA   (05.28.10)
my Mother, in Blessed Memory, worked full-time for survival but her heart was to be a stay-at-home Mom, she was constantly overtired, overstressed, and burdened, she did her best as my Mom but she did NOT enjoy life {poverty is a curse} / my cousin is a full time housewife and proud of it !
27. stroll in the park...
Ynet web reader ,   Niles, IL, USA   (05.28.10)
...who has the time? we have bowed to the golden calf of materialisms, we are politically correct, we accept lies for truth, root causes are shunned, we listen amidst the blaring sounds of marketing rhetorics, even to the point of gullibility, consumerism has filled us to capacity in many we take the time to listen to the Voice of our Soul, the Spirit of our human is a victim of burnout who dumped champagne for beer.
28. 15 5th Gen: Some of King David's children were criminals...
Rivkah   (05.28.10)
Amnon was a rapist and Absalom was seditious, as was Adonijah. David blamed himself because he could not be with his children as much as they needed him to be. That does not mean David was useless.
29. To 22
Charles ,   Petach Tikva   (05.28.10)
The people pay to support THEIR religious leaders , institutions and so . They can also pay this tax for "humanbistic" organisations . But here seculars or anti religious have to pay for religious people . Regarding a "blessing" , we can see how YOU are BLESSED , nothing to be jealous of .
30. To 22 , they pay it VOLUNTARY
Charles ,   Petach Tikva   (05.28.10)
That means , they pay for the organisation they are affiliated with . And this only to pay their institutions , religiouis leaders , and so . This is not the case in France .
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