Jewish Scene
'More religious kids sexually active'
Merav Batito
Published: 02.08.10, 12:03
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77 Talkbacks for this article
1. Sex religion is okay :)
Salma ,   Palestine   (08.02.10)
so poor rabbis, Obedience to you, have limits.
2. The fault is in your own family, in your community....
dorothy friend ,   tel aviv   (08.02.10)
....don't try to blame it on someone or something else. You guys claim moral superiority often enough. You can't have it both ways.
3. Oh No? Oh Yes!
Sarah B ,   U.S.A. / Israel   (08.02.10)
4. 95% of sex offences, religious and charideem
Free Thinker ,   Jerusalem   (08.02.10)
Some education they are getting ! Naturally the Rabbis like to raise a generation of uneducated sheep and then wonder why we get statistics such as this !
5. Haredi parents are to blame
Terry ,   Eilat - Israel   (08.02.10)
It is no point blaming the internet and pornos it is the parents fault as they are religious and repress their children, these poor kids grow up confused and sexually frustrated because the parents keep cramming religion down their necks but this is always the case in religious societies where males and females are separated and sexual desires are taboo and women are treated as secondclass citizens.
6. Need more prohibitions, restrictions, oversight by Rabbis
Sami   (08.02.10)
This is what happens when you let people make their own decisions. They cannot be trusted to make right decisions.
7. Salma look into your own society
Israeli grandma   (08.02.10)
instead of making cheap attacks on Jewish society, which tries to heal its problems. Hence this article. Your society is still covering up incest, rapes, forced marriages of underage girls, female genital mutilation on an appalling scale even in today's "modern times" and the acceptance by your society that females are owned by men and for their unrestricted use as workhorses and sexual victims. And despite teachings of Muhammed, the continuation of the primitive custom of "honour killings"
8. Not just a religious issue...
Bin ,   Jerusalem   (08.02.10)
The lack of proper sex-ed is not just a religious issue, and sexual abuse is not just an Israeli issue... As much as the religious are held to a higher standard for being religious, Israelis/Jews are held to a higher standard by the world for the same reason... The problem isn't necessarily more rampant here, it's simply more shocking because it is unexpected. Sadly, public opinion would find sexual abuse less shocking in say secular Tel Aviv, or in an otherwise oppressive (mysogynistic) religious environment elsewhere in the Middle East...
9. Strange Article
David ,   Israel   (08.02.10)
1. 'We have private parts, and no one has the right to show them to anyone else in the family or outside the family.' 2. 'it's the evil instinct which is sadly inside us, contaminating us' With such unhealthy attitudes toward the human body, what did he expect? Secondly, why call police on your little children? The parents are immature and unable to solve their own problems. Blame the Internet? You must be kidding. Lastly, Ynet has become REALLY annoying digging up dirt on religious people. As if the secular sector is any better. Why not write something more itelligent for a change?
10. Inbreeding... not good for a shallow gene pool.
seadog1946 ,   ShootersIsland NJ   (08.02.10)
11. #7 grandma, you're getting very old ;)
Salma ,   Palestine   (08.02.10)
Article here is about the "Israeli" society !
12. To #11 Salma
Ariel ,   São Paulo - Brazil   (08.02.10)
In Arab society , people who wrotes this kind of thing is stoned to dead... So , welcome , to free world
13. Clueless
israel   (08.02.10)
Suppressing a teenage boy's sexual desires is asking for trouble. The Idiot religious can call sex every name under the sun - fact is, it's a healthy part of life - especially for teenage boys. If sex is so impure, why are there so many religious men going to prostitutes? And they do, in their droves. Denying sexual feelings can and often do, led to rape of women and children.
14. #9 -- the Fundamentalist Jews like to claim that they are...
Dorothy Friend ,   Tel Aviv   (08.02.10)
... better than other Jews and the Chosen Amongst the Chosen. Makes them fair game.
15. To # 7 Isrtaeli grandma
Lioness ,   Israel   (08.02.10)
Could not have said it any better, good for you!
16. Why parents do it regularly
Nora Tel Aviv   (08.02.10)
Children grow by urge and imitation. They understand that grown ups, including their parents, have sex regularly. What they don`t understand is , why not them, the ones having the urge, shouldn`t do it.
17. perspective:
Golan ,   Modiin   (08.02.10)
earlier we read an article of young girls with low self-esteem letting themselves be used as sex toys. The religious jumped on this and claimed that their society is better. Now I read talkbacks claiming no less than 95% of sexual abuse is in the Haredi community or that these things is not because of outside influences but rather because of religious teachings? No. This is a global trend affecting the religious and the secular, Jewish and gentile alike. Its not any one particular thing but rather years of many things. So while we might not be like our neighbors that practice gang rape as punishments or honor killing as placebo we are faced with anarchy which: 1 had always existed 2 seems to be on an increase 3 has many causes 4 seems to be stronger than our ability to stop it However one thing has not been tried. And that is for parents to raise their kids (not by rabbi or teacher proxy.) Unfortunately parents have an uphill battle with the internet which has been described by a police agent hunting pedophiles in the following way. "your kids are home, but when they are on the internet they are outside."
18. #6 let me get this straight
Golan ,   modiin   (08.02.10)
so if a Rabbi tells he this statue of Jesus is God I should listen? if this Rabbi tells me that homosexuality is halahically acceptable just so long as I "only suck on it" its ok? if this Rabbi eats pig, cheats in business and abuses his wife, ignores his children I should still follow him? Are you a nut? This is why G-d gave us the written law, so we know what he wants of us. And this is why we should be very very suspicious of anyone telling us "but the oral law says" and then contradicts the written word. This is why you should think for yourself and not let others think for you... this also goes for TV, Internet, and politicians.
19. A warning to all religious parents
Daniel Breslauer ,   Jerusalem   (08.02.10)
May this be a warning to all religious parents. As for me, I was educated quite openly. We never discussed these issues at home (note that my family is completely secular, humanist), but it was not necessarily taboo either. I learned about everything I wanted to know myself through the internet, and never did anything foolish. I guess some children need more counseling and guidance than others. It should be clear that pretending the problem doesn't exist or pretending it will go away by itself, is not a solution. The only solution is to make proper sexual health education, including all aspects of relationships and including halacha as well as medical and biological points of view. Seeing that children learn about these things no matter what, they might as well learn it from responsible people in a dignified fashion, not from pornographic websites. This is why I think everything possible should be discussed with religious children also, including homosexuality and everything else. For the record, I'm religious myself.
20. Boys and girls should live in separate cities
Rabbi ,   B'nei Brak   (08.02.10)
until they're married.
21. #20 ur nearsighted if u do that then homosexuality will win!
(08.02.10)
I hate to be judgmental but your response is simple! You are forgetting that sex is an attractive and natural calling for human beings. If you separate boys and girls into different cities then what you are going to end up with is a high rate of homosexuality and lesbianism because well SEXUALLY UNEDUCATED boys and girls will give in to their urges! The solution is education. The solution is to end overcrowding in the homes. The solution is NOT sending out the kids for a long walk on Shabbat while mom and dad "take a shabbat rest"! Get with the program...educate!
22. WHERE R THE PARENTS!
(08.02.10)
this article made me cry because all I saw was that all of the children mentioned are being ABUSED & IGNORED! There is no parenting in those homes? What is going on here? Just tears flowing at the screaming ignorance and lack of education.
23. get it straight
factsaregood ,   jerusalem   (08.02.10)
first off, this is a quote from the father, "I'm very open with the kids. We're national-religious, not ultra-Orthodox. I talk to them about sexual relations explaining that one should wait until one is married."- maybe if he had been haredi, this wouldnt have happened! so number 4- where are your statistics from? not from this article! and #5, i dont see a single reference in this story to a specific case of haredi parents, so before you go blaming the parents, get your facts straight! in fact, there is a quote how this problem does NOT affect haredim. if there is someone with this problem in the religious community, it is a matter of self- control. i know from my days in yeshiva that NONE of my friends had this issue then and many years later they still dont. in fact, the only thing that can be proven is that religious life is a pure way of living. when you have cases like this, it just shows that we are not doing are job well enough to educate our children. i dont mean complete shutoff of tv and internet, but i think everyone would agree that they dont want their kids watching and reading inappropriate material.
24. that young stud shlomo takes underage sex to a new level
zionist forever   (08.02.10)
Porn websites are certainly a problem but the parents should be doing more to do that like blocking software. Computers should be password protected to stop children going online without the parents knowladge. Parents should have set internet hours for young children and they can closely monitor them because children have access online to all kinds of things they would never be exposed to outside. TV is also at least part responsible and if you got cable then you don't even know whats going to be shown when. I have watched just regular movies on HOT sometimes early in the day they unexpectedly show naked women and they talk about sex so I am not sure how you deal with that short of banning the TV. Certainly not letting them have a TV in their bedroom Don't let the children have smart cellphones which can access internet all they need is something to make phone calls and send SMS Sex education in both families and schools is a must and i mean explicit they need to know the lot. My parents never were to tell me the birds & the bees and my school didn't even have any sex education classes. I learned about the facts of life as an adult and I guess I am lucky I didn't make any mistakes before I understood but the likes of Shlomo unless he learns one day some girl isn't going to be tasting chocolate ice cream. Children need education & parental responsibility.
25. #17 Golan - Couldnt have said it better
Bin ,   Jerusalem   (08.02.10)
With all the division and hate in our society we close our eyes to the fact that these problems are UNIVERSAL and only likely to be exacerbated over time as technology makes evermore possible. We should be helping eachother rather than scuffing at and stigmatising groups for problems that WILL affect us either directly or indirectly as we are ultimately all part of the same society, and our kids could always fall victim to those we dismiss as backward h"vsh.
26. Over Generalization
Yehoshua ,   USA   (08.02.10)
This article however is over generalization for the whole Haredi community. No matter if your religious or not, there are going to be some children who for which ever reason are prone to being sexual perverse. There a various reasons for this: A) they were born that way; B) their wires are crossed due to the affects of puberty; C) having been sexually abused D) being over stimulated by the modern culture, which is hyper-sexualized; E) The kid is suspect to easy manipulation; F). is young and just made a mistake. However, to apply this circumstances to the Haredi community, as a whole, is slander. We have to understand that Haredi are not super-human and are affected by all the same struggles that all human being have. However, unlike secular world, which embraces hyper-sexualization, the Haredi world's desire to follow the Path of Torah, regardless of how difficult it can be. I would venture to say that the Haredi world has been far more successful at he latter than than this article would lead us to believe. In regards to modern culture. Having witnessed the objectification of women of Israeli tv, in western music and in pornography, there can be no other result but a negative effect on anyone who is exposed to it. However, its the parents responsibility to protect their children but not having this influences in the house, while also explain to them what is out there and how they expect their children to behave and the consequences for not behaving in such a manner.
27. Children are children !
Charles ,   Petach Tikva   (08.02.10)
Why make so much out of it ? When we were young we played "doctor" , without any consequences , without judges , without tv or internet porn . We just were "curious" .....
28. reply to #4 and #5
observer   (08.02.10)
It appears that you did not read the article through, and started your talkbacks as soon as you saw the word religious. Read again what Dr Gottlied said: 'The religious, non-haredi sector is more similar to the secular sector ... It is far easier in the haredi world where there are clear boundaries ....' What could be clearer than that - except when you are blinded by bigotry and hatred.
29. two points to make
observer   (08.02.10)
1: And on this page alone, there are four sex adverts. Do you really expect that this will not eventually percolate through to all levels of society and to all age groups? 2: Now do you understand why the haredi schools forbid computers in their pupils' homes, and refuse to teach them English? Now do you understand why the haredi sector has by and large boycotted the use of cellphones that have internet access? Maybe their leaders know and understand a little more than you give them credit for.
30. Good comment Salma
Smith   (08.02.10)
Sex and religion is ok? It is could explain why in your world womens are for reproduction and young boys for pleasure.
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