Mommy, there are haredim in the water!
Now that Tisha B'Av is behind us, the haredim step out of their yeshiva halls and into the wilderness. Some don’t like it.Tali Farkash reports from a travel agency incident
Tisha B'Av is behind us and before we properly wiped our tears, a new season is starting - "ben hazmanim", the interim period, the haredim's hiking and vacation time. According to an age-old Jewish tradition, between the weeping time of Tisha B'Av and the lamentations of the month of Elul, Jews need to have some fresh air. Now, the strictly Orthodox start migrating from the old neighborhoods to the waterfall districts. They leave no stone unturned, no spring undipped. Wherever you may go, they have been there twice before. They have no "secret path" or "hidden waterfall" - they know it all.
And so, on a particularly hot summer day, I accompanied a friend to a travel agency where we were about to hear some cooling suggestions against this sticky and endless heat wave that we call an Israeli summer. While we contemplated whether we should spend an additional NIS 40 just to have a closer look at the cliffs of Manara, with no extras, we overheard a conversation between the travel agent and a tight-lipped client.
"What do you mean, after Tisha B'Av? Didn’t I explicitly state that I want the Tisha B'Av week?" She looked like she was about to stamp her feet or have a candy tantrum right there, on the carpet. "Yes, you are right," the poor agent tried to calm her, losing as she went. "You did ask for the week of Tisha B'Av, but you wanted your vacation to start after the weekend," she desperately whispered into the Crete pamphlet.
Conquering the Banias (Photo: Salima Abu Gosh)
"No way," the client was adamant. "Do you know what happens after Tisha B'Av?" she sounded as if she envisioned some horrible tragedy. "The haredim go on vacation! Last year, I could not see the Banias waterfall. It was packed with those blacks and I had no view." Yes, it is a busy season, the agent tried again. Many people hike. "Yeah, yeah," the client hushed her. "People don’t hike in such huge groups as 'they' do."
My friend and I tried to disappear into our chairs before the angry lady should notice that we are with the haredim who block her view and now followed her into the agency. Luckily for us, she was busy discovering Crete and hear the agent recommend "a great deal," switching the subject.
I could hear my friend gritting her teeth while benignly watching a poster of a Hawaiian beach - a must in every travel agency. "You see," she fumed silently, "they do not appreciate even that. Instead of being glad that we are enthusiastic about and interested in Israeli sites, they somehow managed to turn it into a negative thing. If she does not like haredim, she should visit the Banias on a Shabbat - not a kippah in sight!" she added angrily.
Worried that the two might clash, I pulled her out of the ring before having to call in the mediators. "Hey, they have a deal to the Manara cliff that includes mountain-climbing. How about it?" I tried to pull her away, but she was past the point of no return with her own secret plan. Before I had time to show her the brochure on country holidays in Moshav Ramot, my friend put on a huge smile and marched toward the agent and her client, who were already busy ticketing the Crete deal.
"May I take a look at this brochure?" my strictly Orthodox friend asked the prospective tourist of the magical island of Crete. "I heard Crete is amazing this time of year," she flashed a smile at the Banias trauma victim. "You know," she lightly blurted, "we thought about taking a vacation in Israel - a zimmer, a walk in Yahudiya, a dip in the Banias - but my husband and I decided," she sighed deeply, "that the sight of all those girls in bikinis is bad for our children's upbringing. We heard that there are wonderful and isolated beaches in Crete. This will be just right for us. Can you recommend a hotel?"
Before any of the two had a chance to react, my friend took the brochure, held her head high, and walked out of the agency. The two were left there sitting, trying hard to find some other "excellent deal" to a location that the haredim have not yet discovered.
