Sent by God

All the warning signs were on the wall - an apocalyptic war has been raging, here and in the world.

But despite all the signs, he still managed to surprise us.

Experts say that there was no prior intelligence about a white donkey. Maybe he made a navigational error, or maybe he took an alternative route in order to avoid an anti-disengagement road block. 

But who predicted that he would make himself known at the Gay Pride Parade?

And so, ladies and gentleman, the messiah finally has a name and a face: Yishai Schlissel, only 30 years-old, and, it turns out, he was here the whole time.

He waited a long time to come out of the closet - and what better time was there than the gay march in the Holy City? And so, despite the delay, he has arrived - and he has made quite an entrance.

He came to “murder in the name of God, because there cannot be such an abomination in this land.”

None other than God Himself sent him to stab gays. Not just to stab, but to murder.

The truth is that this isn’t the first time that we have missed our messiah, those that are sent from above to liberate us from our torments.

God works in mysterious ways

Did anyone from the University of Bar-Ilan honor Yigal Amir, who would one day come and save the nation? And what about Baruch Goldstein? They also had real messianic zeal.

But we, as is our way, dismissed them.

There were also messiahs who, on a Godly mission, threw crammed diapers at police officers.

Others simply hid weaponry for the day when they may wonder into the Temple Mount, or happen to run into an Arab peasant or Knesset member.

What did they get from us in response? At best, a criminal record, at worst a pathetic talk show slot.

What rights does a nation have that treats its messiahs in this way? Look at Gaza and Iran - these are places that know how to honor such people.

Actually, if one thinks about it, there have also been secular messiahs, and even - God help us - leftist messiahs.

Those that promised us full peace and a flourishing economy, and who said they would usher in a new Middle East.

Those messiahs didn’t end the cocktail parties and celebrations when the peace agreements were violated with bloodshed.

And there were messiahs who had no political or economic agendas - strange people who wanted to run naked in the stadium.

Are you confused? That’s the whole point. The ways of God are mysterious, and he surprises us from a new angle every time.

What’s really strange about this story is that in the moment of truth, the messiah disappears, and is replaced by pragmatism.

Bring on the messiahs

We looked up at the sky for two thousand years, because to do anything else was considered heresy.

And then we realized that he is waiting for us to move our backsides.

So we established a state with a lot of vision, but without a messiah. Now we’ve recreated him.

The truth is that it's not so bad to have messiahs in our generation. On the contrary, bring them on. It could be a decent solution.

If God sent someone to stop a bulldozer because of the tombs of our patriarchs, he must have sent someone to pave the Trans-Israel Highway.  

If someone was sent to put a pig’s head in a mosque, another was commanded to place him in administrative detention.

There are those who were sent to settle the whole of the Land of Israel, and their friends were then sent by God to uproot them.

And facing Yishai Schlissel, son of David and messiah, are men holding hands, placed there by the master of the universe.