How far are you willing to go to stand out on dating apps? For many people, the answer lies in their profile photo. In the digital dating market, where first impressions are judged in a split second, many believe a sexy picture is the obvious way to attract matches and stop the endless scrolling.
Men often post shirtless photos highlighting their muscles, while women pose in revealing swimsuits. But a new study suggests that the same sexy photos that flatter users and present them at their best may actually drive away people looking for a meaningful relationship.
The study, led by Prof. Gurit Birnbaum together with doctoral student Kobi Zholtack and undergraduate students from the Baruch Ivcher School of Psychology at Reichman University, in collaboration with Prof. Harry Reis of the University of Rochester, examined how sexually suggestive profiles influence the way people are perceived — and whether others see them as suitable for a serious relationship.
In the age of dating apps, a profile picture functions as a kind of gatekeeper. If it fails to grab immediate attention, users will likely swipe past it. That reality helps explain why many people choose to present themselves in a more sexualized way. But the study’s findings point to a less appealing cost.
Researchers conducted three studies involving 410 participants ages 20 to 35, with an average age of 25.
In the first study, participants viewed profiles featuring sexy photos compared with neutral photos. Researchers found that people with more sexualized profiles were perceived as lower-quality partners and generated less interest for long-term relationships.
In the second study, participants watched videos of the same people presented in either sexy or neutral versions. The results were similar: sexualized self-presentation led viewers to perceive the person as less intelligent and as a lower-quality partner, which reduced interest in pursuing a meaningful relationship.
The third study examined whether the negative effect could be softened through a positive, relationship-oriented self-description. The results were more complex.
When men viewed women’s profiles, warm and caring descriptions helped soften the negative impression created by sexy photos. But women viewing men’s profiles reacted differently: the combination of a sexualized image and value-driven text raised suspicion and hurt perceptions of the man’s credibility.
The researchers concluded that attracting immediate attention is not necessarily the best path to a meaningful relationship. The way people present themselves online shapes how others interpret them — whether they are seen merely as a body or as a whole person with emotions, thoughts and desires.
“An attractive photo is indeed the first thing that will capture the attention of potential partners. But to generate interest, especially for those seeking a serious relationship, it does not have to be sexual,” Birnbaum explained.
She suggested choosing flattering but authentic photos that show different aspects of life, such as work, friends, travel, pets or meaningful hobbies.
“Such a photo not only catches the eye but also sparks curiosity and adds depth,” she said. “It offers a glimpse into who you really are and what matters to you beyond physical appearance, while conveying your qualities as a partner and what you are looking for.”
She also recommended pairing profile photos with more personal self-descriptions that stand out from generic dating profiles and encourage a more emotional and human connection.
“That way, you can stand out, appear attractive and still convey potential for a serious relationship,” she said.
“In a dating world that seems to offer endless options, many people try to attract immediate attention, but it’s important to remember that this is only the first stage,” Birnbaum said.
“What determines what happens next is how the profile is perceived as a whole: whether it presents a complete person with depth and emotions, or reduces them to a body alone. To spark genuine interest, there is no need to appear less sexy. The challenge is making sure that aspect does not overshadow who you really are and what you truly have to offer.”