“I froze my eggs five years ago because I realized there was a chance I would become a mother later in life, and I wanted to give myself a safety net. I can honestly say I set myself a lot of deadlines for having a child on my own, and I kept postponing them. At 35, I said I would wait until 37, and at 37 I said I would wait until 39.
“It’s still something that runs through my mind, but I hope I won’t ultimately need it, because it isn’t my ideal. The dream is to do it the traditional way and build a family with my husband. On the other hand, having a child of my own wouldn’t stop me from meeting a partner later,” says Yaara Mordechay, 40, from Be’er Yaakov in central Israel.
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Yaara Mordechay. Still holding on to the hope of having a child with someone she loves
(Photo:Courtesy)
Mordechay is a makeup artist specializing in bridal, fashion and evening makeup. Makeup is also one of her favorite passions, and she says she genuinely loves her work. In her free time, she enjoys spending time with friends and family, going to cafés and restaurants, traveling abroad and seeing the world.
‘I’m not living in a fantasy’
“Even though it isn’t always as easy or glamorous as it looks, I really love my work because I love making my brides happy. Yes, I’m single and accompanying a bride on her wedding day, but I’m not desperate to get married and I don’t feel a pang in my heart. While I’m working, I don’t ask myself, ‘Why hasn’t it happened for me yet?’ or get lost in those thoughts, because this is my routine and it feels natural to me.”
Yaara Mordechay. Loves traveling the world, but also coming home to binge-watch a good series
(Photo: Courtesy)
Where do you meet men?
“In my day-to-day life, I don’t really meet men because I’m surrounded mostly by women, so I’m on dating apps a little, but I haven’t had spectacular success there. Sometimes men approach me when I go out, and I like that interaction, but I mainly prefer meeting through mutual friends because it gives me a sense of security.
“I get fewer romantic messages or approaches on social media because I mostly post business content and don’t put myself front and center.”
You have tens of thousands of Instagram followers. Could that intimidate men?
“I haven’t encountered that. Some men ask for my Instagram and then see that I have 90,000 followers and actually get excited because they realize I’m very successful in my field.
“Still, I’m not especially in favor of giving out my Instagram because I don’t see the point of going back onto another viral platform instead of moving things into real life. It also reflects the glamorous side of my life, but not really me.
“I mainly post bridal makeup and some lifestyle content from vacations and trips, and I wouldn’t want someone to think I’m living some glamorous fantasy, because I’m really not. My brides are always telling me, ‘Wow, you’re so down-to-earth,’ because Instagram gives a very different impression. I’m also a very private person and I don’t post about my personal life.
Yaara Mordechay. Instagram gives a very different impression
(Photo: Courtesy)
“A lot of people have no idea I’m single, and they’re surprised. I was also sure that by 40 I would already be married with children, and I would like it to have happened already, but in the end everyone has the path God has planned for them. I guess I just haven’t found the right person yet. I am making an effort, especially recently.”
Why especially now?
“It comes in waves. There are periods when I make more of an effort, then I let go a little and rest, and then I start looking again. It’s not that I’m going crazy over it now, but I am investing a little more than usual because I really want love and a relationship, and because I want to build a family traditionally. That’s also part of what motivates the search.
“I’ve been in meaningful relationships, I’ve experienced crazy love in my life and I’ve also lived with a partner, but in the end it didn’t progress the way I expected.
“I used to believe you had to feel fireworks. Today I understand that not everything has to be ‘wow.’ Sometimes it’s better to start a relationship calmly and give yourself time to really understand the person sitting across from you.”
Yaara Mordechay. Today she’ll give someone a chance instead of waiting for the ‘wow’ factor
(Photo: Courtesy)
“At 30, I expected an instant click and attraction, and half an hour into the date I would already decide whether to continue or end it. Today, I’ll give someone a chance if the conversation is good and I find the person interesting.
“There have been times when I wasn’t attracted to a man at first, but the attraction developed later because he showed confidence, charisma and humor.”
What are you looking for in a man?
“A warm, family-oriented person with values and his feet on the ground, someone who knows what he wants from himself and from life and isn’t confused. It’s important that he be emotionally available and genuinely want to build a home, a family and have children.
“In terms of looks, I don’t have a specific type, but I prefer a tall man because I’m 1.76 meters (about 5-foot-9).
“A degree, title or social status doesn’t really determine anything for me, but I do want an ambitious man with motivation, someone I can grow alongside and someone I can learn from.
“I’m not looking for a man to support me financially because I know how to do that myself. But I do want a man I can lean on emotionally, so that at the end of the day, when I come home, I have a friend, a partner and a companion waiting for me.
“I’m also a woman of deep faith, and I would like a partner with a connection to tradition because celebrating Jewish holidays and making Kiddush on Shabbat are important to me.”
What is your biggest weakness?
“I’m very sensitive and sometimes I take things too much to heart.”
What is love to you?
“The feeling that you’ve found your best friend and the person you want to share your life with.”
Yaara Mordechay. She’ll do anything for her brides
(Photo: Courtesy)
Do you believe in love at first sight?
“I used to. Today I think it’s more like attraction at first sight, because love comes through getting to know someone.”
When was the last time your heart was broken?
“Within the past year. I met someone I really thought could develop into something good, and it didn’t happen.”
What have you learned about yourself in relationships?
“When I love, I love with everything I have. I’ve also learned to be more open, to listen and to make room for the other person.”
What is the most important ingredient in a relationship?
“Communication. Knowing how to talk about everything, when things are pleasant and when they aren’t.”
What hurts you?
“Disrespect and dismissiveness, especially when they come from people who are important to me.”
In your fantasy, what is your ideal partner like?
“He’s family-oriented and kind and knows what he wants from himself and from life. He makes me laugh a lot, we have fun together and I learn a lot from him.”
Do you have a deal breaker?
“A lifestyle that doesn’t suit me, and a man who doesn’t genuinely want a serious relationship and family.”
Smoking?
“Yes. I smoke myself and really want to quit.”
What age range are you looking for?
“35 to 45.”
Would you consider a divorced man, including one with children?
“Yes, but it depends on the person and the situation.”
Yaara Mordechay. When she loves, she gives it everything
(Photo: Courtsy)
Tell us about your worst date.
“I met someone through an app, and in real life I could barely recognize him from his photos. Then, instead of trying to get to know me, he tried to convince me that we were really compatible.”
Describe the perfect date.
“It doesn’t matter where, as long as there’s a good vibe, lots of smiles and time passes without us noticing. A date where, by the end, both of us already want to see each other again.”
Should a man pay on the first date?
“Yes. Not because of the money. To me, it’s part of the courtship.”
What do you do in your free time?
“I love traveling the world, listening to music, spending time with family and friends, and also staying home with a good series.”
What is your favorite place and why?
“Thailand. There’s a feeling of freedom and detachment there that’s hard to explain in words.”
What makes you laugh?
“I laugh at a lot of things, but especially witty people. I also like dark humor.”
When did you last cry, and why?
“Not long ago. I’m very sensitive, so nothing especially dramatic has to happen for me to tear up.”
Yaara Mordechay. Preferably tall, since she’s 5-foot-9 without heels
(Photo: Courtesy)
How close are you to your family?
“Very, very close. My family is my anchor and the most important thing to me.”
What were you in a previous life?
“I have no idea. I’m still trying to figure out this one.”
What was the last series you binge-watched?
“I’ll Find You.”
What music do you listen to?
“Mostly mainstream, but really a little bit of everything.”
Tell us something nobody knows about you.
“I’m afraid of fish, and I don’t eat them at all.”
How would your friends describe you?
“The friend who will always be there, listen without judging and also tell you the truth when needed.”
What do you do on Shabbat eve?
“I never skip Kiddush with my family.”
So where can someone approach you?
“Anywhere. He just needs a little courage.”
Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
“Married, with a family and at least two children, happy, still fulfilling myself and continuing to grow.”
Want to ask Yaara out? Message her on Instagram